Worth It Page 7

  He gave a terse, jerky shake of the head. “Not yet. My call went straight to voice mail. But I did talk to Ten, and Zoey had the baby.”

  As I lifted my gaze, curious for this news, Eva gasped. “Oh my God, already? Is everyone okay?”

  She gripped his arm, her eyes wide. Pick drew both her and the child she was holding against him for a hug. “I think so, yeah. They put baby J.B. in the NICU because his lungs were still underdeveloped, but all the doctors seem optimistic. And Ten said Zoey was doing great. They’d all been in to see her. Quinn wouldn’t leave her side.” Pick glanced at me over Eva’s shoulder. “Sounds like you got her to the hospital just in time, Parker.”

  “Wait. What?” Eva pulled out of Pick’s embrace so she could frown between the two of us. “What did I miss? You mean, Knox took Zoey to the hospital? How did those two even meet?”

  “All part of the million and one things I need to update you with,” Pick answered.

  She grabbed his arm. “Well, then come into the kitchen with me, because I want to be updated right-freaking-now.”

  Pick chuckled but followed her wishes.

  As I was left alone with Skylar, I turned my head to sniff her dark hair, wishing it were red. She sighed in her sleep, all her little muscles relaxed as she rested so trustingly against me. I was able to give back a little of my own trust, and the tight coils inside me loosened. I closed my eyes and continued to stroke her head.

  The soft hair under my fingers brought back memories. When sleep snuck in around me, it was the first thing I dreamed about, my hands buried deep in rich red hair. Long dark lashes fluttered before blue eyes opened to peer at me with an expression of warmth that filled me with a joy I’d never felt before.

  The peaceful, binding sensation followed me as I looked around at the forest surrounding us, the chirp of birds soothing more of my soul. Finally feeling at home for the first time in too long, I reached for a hand I would recognize anywhere, and smooth, familiar fingers tangled with mine.

  Life was perfect, until someone nudged my shoulder. “Hey, Parker. Tink has some lunch ready for you.”

  I blinked awake and started to shift upright in the chair until the weight in my arms alerted me to the fact I was still holding Skylar. “Sorry,” I mumbled, bringing her off my shoulder and down into the cradle of my arms. “I must’ve dozed off.”

  Instead of feeling more tired as I usually felt after a rest full of nightmares, I felt refreshed, and I realized it’d been because I’d had a nice dream. A dream about her.

  My gut clenched. I hadn’t dreamt about her in years, unless it was a nightmare where something bad was happening to her.

  “Not a problem,” Pick told me. “I fall asleep all the time when putting them down for naps.” He bent over me and took the sleeping infant. “I’ll put her to bed so you can head into the kitchen. Eva whipped up a sandwich and some soup for you.”

  My stomach gave another grumble, so I pushed out of the rocker. Julian was seated in a high chair demolishing a plate of sliced bananas and raisins, eating a few as well. When I paused in the entrance, Eva glanced up from where she was ladling soup into a bowl at the stove.

  She smiled. “Take any seat you like, though I warn you, if you sit too close to Julian, you’ll probably end up sticky and gross. He tends to fling food.”

  I sat next to the kid anyway, because the seat closest to him looked like the most inconspicuous, out-of-the-way spot between the table and the wall.

  Julian paused in the middle of smashing a piece of banana into his plate. Then he picked up the mutilated chunk and held it my way, as if making some kind of peace offering.

  I shook my head. “No thanks.”

  Eva chuckled and set the soup and sandwich in front of me. “Pick always offers him a bite off his plate, so I think Julian assumes sharing food is an expected course of etiquette now.”

  I tore off a crustless piece of the grilled cheese Eva had made me, and offered it to Julian. He took it gracefully and then shoved it not-so gracefully into his mouth before sending me a big grin.

  “And your male bonding is complete.” Eva slid into the chair across from me, and even though she sent me a warm smile, it made me tense.

  Bonding with her children was one thing. Getting cozy with her was quite another. And I realized exactly why a moment later while she watched me dip my crust into the tomato soup to take my first bite.

  “Pick says you didn’t have that scar before you were arrested.”

  And here came the reason adults were so much more complicated. They asked questions you didn’t want to answer. Though to be honest, my scar was the last topic I thought she’d attack.

  I touched the area briefly. “No.” My gruff answer put out the warning signals, cautioning her not to go there. “I didn’t.”

  But she did, anyway. “Did you get it when you killed those two men in prison?”

  I gazed at her steadily, refusing to answer. All the while, in my mind’s eye, I saw the crudely crafted blade slashing toward me, felt the sting of the tip as it sliced open my flesh, tasted the blood as it dripped into my mouth.

  “So it’s a story you don’t wish to share.” Eva nodded respectfully. “I have a couple of those.” But instead of leaving me be, she kept on. “Pick says you look totally different, much bigger, buffer. And you talk gruffer. You even walk different, with a bit of a limp.”

  Remembering the distinct black sole of the boot that had hurled at me right before it kicked in my windpipe and crushed it, and the pain in my leg when they’d stabbed that, I cleared my throat and concentrated on swallowing down a dry piece of toast.

  “I lifted weights a lot to help pass the time,” I said, feeling as if I needed to give her some kind of response, or she’d just keep pestering.

  She smiled big. “I figured you weren’t the type who liked to stay idle.”

  “No, ma’am.”

  With a nod, she added, “Maybe you’d like to help me carry some boxes of old baby clothes down to my car once you’re done eating then.”

  “Okay.” I put down my spoon and began to stand, but she laughed and waved me back into my seat.

  “Not now. After you eat. There’s no hurry. They’ve been boxed up and ready to take to Goodwill for weeks. I keep meaning to ask Pick to carry them out, but for some reason, I always get distracted whenever I see him.”

  He appeared in the doorway, and I could tell exactly what distracted her about his presence as her gaze heated and ran over him. He went to her and wrapped an arm around her shoulder, so I looked away, trying to forget how it’d always felt to be near that one special person, how just her smile could light me up.

  I focused my attention on Julian as I watched Pick and Eva kiss out of my peripheral vision. He offered me another chunk of banana. This time, I took it without a word.

  “I’m going to check on one of my waitresses who isn’t answering her phone. So, I’ll be out for a couple minutes.”

  When I glanced up, I noticed he was telling me his plans, not Eva. She didn’t look surprised, so I figured he’d already shared this news with her, along with the million and one things he’d gossiped about me while I’d been sleeping.

  A split second later, I tensed, realizing he was leaving me alone with Eva. The idiot hadn’t seen me in six years, and even then, we hadn’t been all that close, mostly just passing acquaintances. He knew why I’d been arrested; he knew what I’d done when I was in prison. Why the hell was he being stupid enough to allow me to be here with just his woman and two kids?

  Eva cleared her throat. “Do you want me to go and talk to her?”

  Pick leaned down to kiss the top of her head. “Not this time. I don’t like her boyfriend and don’t want you to have to deal with him if he’s there.”

  She narrowed her eyes. “I think I can handle—”

  “Not on my watch, babe.”

  Before Eva could protest again, he kissed her full on the mouth. Then he straightened, snagged a set of key
s off the wall, and pointed at Julian. “Behave for your mother while I’m gone, squirt.”

  “Bye-bye,” the boy called and held up a slice of banana to his father.

  Pick grinned at him and leaned down to take the food straight from Julian’s fingers with his teeth. “Mmmn. Thanks, man.”

  Eva shuddered. “That’s so disgusting. You know he just slobbered all over that.”

  “You mean, like I’m going to slobber all over you?” With a wicked grin, he descended on her. She screamed out a laugh and dodged her face to the side, but Pick caught her and kissed her, anyway.

  I looked away again, catching Julian’s eye. He grinned at me, his smile seeming to say, they do that all the time.

  When Pick pulled away, he waved at me. “We’ll talk work schedules when I get back.”

  After he left, I was still too leery to take a breath. I couldn’t figure out why he hadn’t wanted Eva to go somewhere where he didn’t like one of his waitress’s boyfriends, but he hadn’t thought twice about leaving her here alone with me.

  “Pick is a great judge of character,” Eva said, making me jump.

  Wondering if I’d said something aloud or she was just reading my mind, I glanced at her suspiciously. She sent me a soft smile. “I swear, I can smell the tension oozing off you. You didn’t want to be left alone with us, but don’t worry, I’ll stop bothering you and asking you a load of questions. Okay?”

  I wanted to tell her she could ask anything she wanted to. This was her home; she had a right to know what kind of person was staying in it. But I was too relieved for a reprieve to voice any of that.

  “I will put you to work as soon as you’re finished eating, though.”

  And that’s what she did. After my soup and grilled cheese sandwich were gone, she held Julian and instructed me as to which boxes to carry and where to take them.

  About the time I finished, Julian fell asleep on her shoulder and Skylar woke from her nap. After putting one to bed and carrying the other into the living room, she sent me an exhausted sigh. “Believe it or not, once upon a time I had them on a schedule where they slept at the same time, but not anymore.”

  I tried to see my own mother in her, perpetually exhausted, too busy to sit and just relax. She’d always looked aged beyond her years, and sad. So freaking sad. Eva didn’t seem sad, though. There was an energy and youth about her that told me she thrived off the life she had.

  I opened my mouth to tell her it seemed as if she had mothering down to a fine art, but the front door opened and Pick returned.

  “Hey.” Eva met him there with a kiss. “How’d she take it?”

  Pick sighed, his shoulders sagging. “She wasn’t there. Some other woman answered the door, and apparently…” Pick glanced at me. “My waitress no longer lives there.”

  With a gasp, Eva shook her head. “Since when?”

  Pick shrugged. “No idea. I didn’t stick around to find out.” Growling out his impatience, he paced further into the room and ran his hand through his hair, only to pause when he caught sight of me watching him.

  Eva came up behind him and grasped his arm. “When’s the next time she’s scheduled to work?”

  “Friday,” Pick answered, keeping his gaze on me.

  “Do you think she’s okay?”

  “She’d better be.” He hitched his chin at me. “I think we’ll start you at the bar tomorrow. It’s kind of an initiation rite to begin our new bartenders on ladies’ night, anyway.” His grin was secretive and amused, which made me narrow my eyes, but I shrugged, because it didn’t matter to me which night I started. I was actually restless to start as soon as possible. The sooner I made some money, the sooner I could get out of their hair.

  The rest of the night passed. Both kids scurried around, providing some entertainment. And Pick talked, updating me on people we both remembered from high school, except he never shared a single detail about the only person I really wanted to know about. And I refused to ask about her, because it was best if I never learned where or how she’d turned out.

  But still, I wanted to know, and it itched at me that he didn’t even mention her, didn’t volunteer one stray crumb of information.

  Eva dug up some old black T-shirts of Pick’s from back when he was a bartender at the very club he now owned. They were too tight on me, but we figured they’d do until I could get my own set of clothes.

  Then Pick did an internet search on my brothers. We didn’t find the location of any living Parker I was related to, but he did find out Speed had been the one to die in the fire, and Hash had overdosed on cocaine.

  When I went to bed that night, tucked away in Spiderman sheets, I couldn’t stop thinking about my brothers, my sister, Bentley. My parents. I wondered where Rocket and Cobra were and worried about how painfully the others had died. When I finally fell into a restless sleep, blood and sirens and smoke filled my head. My mother and sister screaming for help. My father staring into the headlights of an oncoming train. And the root of all my nightmares, the voice in my head saying, “I’ve been waiting months to get my hands on your sweet ass again, Parker.”

  I woke mid-moan, thrashing on the single-sized bed and soaking it with sweat. Once I realized where I was, I rolled flat on my back and stared up at the glowing stars tacked to the ceiling until my breathing calmed.

  I was safe. I was free. I had something to look forward to. It was more than I’d had the night before, and yet a heaviness settled deep into my bones. My family was gone, my criminal record would always keep me from aspiring too high, and the woman I loved—would always love—was out there somewhere, probably curled up in some other man’s arms.

  Rolling onto my side, I punched my pillow to fluff it when I sensed someone enter my room. I froze in the dark and squinted, hoping I hadn’t woken Pick or Eva with my nightmare, but when I saw the silhouette of my guest, I realized it was one of the kids.

  It waddled toward the bed and began to climb onto the mattress with me. I could tell it was Julian by the hair.

  “Nigh-nigh,” he mumbled before collapsing against me and settling in for sleep.

  I lay there frozen, not sure what to do. It didn’t feel right to kick the guy out of his own bed, but it felt wrong to let him stay, too. I didn’t want Pick to think I was some kind of pedophile, stealing his kids in the middle of the night and dragging them to bed with me. But Julian had already made himself at home and didn’t seem like he was willing to move.

  So I let him cuddle against me. He was out in seconds. Five minutes later, his sister found us. She crawled onto the bed, created another nest on top of me and was asleep almost as quickly as Julian.

  For some reason, I didn’t mind the intrusion. Their sweetness and innocence had a calming effect. When I dropped off not long after them, I didn’t have another nightmare for the rest of the night. My dreams were filled with red hair, blue eyes, and a smile that meant the world to me.

  He was already there when I arrived, cradling a wiggling bundle in his arms. He didn’t see me at first, which gave me some time to appreciate the sight of him bending his head over the infant and cooing at her, his strong shoulders and back muscles shifting under the cloth of his worn T-shirt. When he paced under a break in the trees, a slice of sunlight flared down on him, making his chocolate brown hair more golden.

  My breath caught as I slowed to a stop. He had to be the most breathtaking boy to ever grace the planet. And he was here, waiting for me.

  When I stepped forward, a twig snapped under my feet. He lifted his head and smiled. “There you are.”

  His grin did things to me. The way his lips stretched and his eyes warmed as if he were genuinely happy to see me, it melted my insides.

  “Keep smiling, kiddo,” he told the baby. “Someone’s here to see you.”

  “Is she smiling?” Forgetting about the crazy stir he caused in me, I hurried forward, momentarily more curious to see the baby than I was to see him.

  He turned and twisted his arms to
put her on full display, and I caught my breath, freshly surprised by how much Bainbridge she had in her. The red hair looked particularly bright in this light, and her blue eyes were wide and curious as she gazed up at me.

  “Hi, baby Bentley,” I cooed, tickling her chin. “I’m your Aunt Felicity.”

  When Knox sucked in a startled breath, I glanced up, worried. “What?”

  I immediately scanned the trees, sure we were caught. I was so busy darting my gaze around for trouble, I didn’t catch his expression until he said, “I just realized you’re related to her just as much as I am.”

  Shoulders easing, I brought my attention back to Knox and our niece. Sending him a small smile, I hedged, “So, I guess that would mean I have just as much right to hold her as you do?”

  He sniffed out an amused sound. “Is that your way of asking if you can hold her?”

  I nodded and batted my eyelashes at him playfully. “Pretty please?”

  His grin broke out, even though he made a big, groaning production about having to give her up. “Okay, fine. If you’re going to be a big baby about it.”

  But as soon as he started to hand her over, I lost my nerve and jumped backward. “Wait.”

  “What?” This time, he was the one to scan the trees as he tucked Bentley protectively close.

  I blew out a breath. “Nothing, I just...I realized I’ve never actually...held a baby before.”

  “You’ve never...” He blinked a few times before he burst out laughing.

  “I don’t see how that’s funny at all,” I muttered, my face growing scarlet. “What if I don’t hold her right? What if I hurt her? What if I...break her?”

  “Oh my God. Seriously?” He bent slightly, he was snickering so hard. I was tempted to slug him in the arm. But something in my expression must’ve alerted him to my true distress, because he calmed himself and shook his head. “You’re not going to break the baby, Felicity. Here. Put your arms out like you’re already holding one, and I’ll slip her into place.”