With Every Heartbeat Read online

  “Ten’s your secret admirer?” I lifted my dazed gaze to her, and she stared back, looking just as shocked as I felt before the biggest smile bloomed across her face.

  “He is.” She covered her mouth as tears glistened in her eyes. And then she started to laugh. “Oh my God. He really is.”

  She sat down blindly in her chair and kept staring at the picture he’d put so much time and detail into drawing. “I can’t believe he’s such a good artist. None of the crap he turns in for class assignments ever looks this good.”

  I sat beside her, taking Reese’s spot. “I found out on Saturday he’s actually an architecture major.”

  She blinked at me. Then she shook her head. “But why would he be taking a beginning art course if he was a senior with a major in architecture?”

  I probably shouldn’t tell her, but I drew in a breath and did anyway. I was tired of lying to so many people about so many things. “I think he knew that wasn’t your brother’s class schedule he saw on the table at your house. I think he just...he wanted a reason to be close to you.”

  Caroline huffed out a breath. She gazed wildly around the room for a minute before focusing on me again. “But...he pushed me away. I tried to kiss him, and he—”

  “You’re his best friend’s little sister. He knows he should stay away.”

  Her mouth fell open. “Well, fuck that. If Oren...if he really, truly, honestly likes me, Noel is not getting in my way.”

  With a laugh, I blurted out, “I wish I could be more like you.”

  She snorted. But I think she was too thrilled about the idea of Ten actually liking her to bother arguing with me. Instead, she started to fluff her hair and pinch her cheeks. “Shit. I knew I should’ve dressed up today. How do I look? Be honest.”

  I grinned. “You look lovely.”

  Reese arrived then, carrying a Styrofoam cup. “Starbucks is freaking bound and determined that I not get my white chocolate mocha today. They were out of lids and I almost spilled this on me twice already.” She nearly tripped over her feet and spilled it again when she saw me sitting in her chair. “Oh! Hi.”

  “Sorry.” I started to stand and give her her chair back. “We were just talking.”

  But she waved me back down. “No, it’s okay. Stay. I can sit by Quinn. He always smells good, anyway. I can drink my latte and sniff him all hour.”

  Yes, that’s what I usually did all hour too, sans the latte.

  He entered the room then, talking to Ten who entered with him, now wearing a T-shirt.

  Everything inside me perked to attention.

  Next to me, Caroline sucked in a breath.

  Quinn looked amazing; his hair was styled as if he’d hand combed it and his shirt was one of those plaid, form-fitting button-up things that conformed to his large frame snugly enough to make my mouth water.

  “...and then she scratched the shit out of my back when she came,” Ten was saying. He lifted the back of his shirt that I could now read: “Hey! The chick who usually sucks my dick has a shirt just like yours.” Then he twisted his torso to show off long red scratch marks on his back to Quinn...except all of us saw them.

  My mouth fell open as I glanced at Caroline.

  Her face went sheet white as she surged to her feet. “Oh. My. God.” Gritting her teeth, she glared at Ten as if she would gladly murder him in that second. She literally quivered as she fisted her hands at her sides.

  He paused when he noticed the force of her attention. Dropping his shirt casually back into place, he frowned. “What’s wrong with you?”

  “You know what,” she snarled. “You are. You make me absolutely sick. The way you whore around is appalling. You’d have to dip your dick in acid to clean off all the girls you’ve ever had.”

  Pulling back in surprise from the venom of her statement, he started to shake his head, only to snort and ask, “Why would I want to clean that shit off? Took me years to build up that much pussy.”

  “Oh...you...” Her rage was so toxic I think it bubbled over into me, because I suddenly felt the urge to—

  Snatching Reese’s cup off her desk, Caroline upended the entire drink on Ten’s head.

  “My mocha!”

  “Shit, woman! That’s hot.”

  My mouth fell open as chaos erupted: Caroline fuming, Ten trying to shake off the wet steam oozing down his face and appalling T-shirt, and Reese bemoaning her lost drink. Then Caroline shoulder-checked Ten hard before she stalked off down the steps and out of the room.

  Quinn glanced at me questioningly, then he did a double take when he seemed to realize Reese was going to sit by him today instead of me. I swear a smidgeon of hurt entered his eyes, but Ten stole our attention when he started cussing.

  “What the fuck was that about?”

  I didn’t feel like telling him Caroline had figured out he was her secret admirer, but Reese had no problem clearing her throat and saying, “Maybe next time don’t talk about your sex life in front of her, okay, moron? Maybe then I can actually drink my morning dose of sugar and caffeine instead of watching it wasted all over your stupid, idiot head.”

  Ten spread his arms and gaped at her. “I’m covered in second-degree burns over here and you’re worried about your fucking drink?”

  “Well...yeah.” Reese rolled her eyes. “And you’re fine. They’re probably not even first-degree burns, you big baby.”

  Ten sniffed and turned around to march off. “Unbelievable.”

  Reese sniffed too. “I’m not going to be worth anything without my fix.” She stood up and wished Quinn and me a good day before she too took off.

  Leaving me alone with Quinn Hamilton.

  My breath hitched in my chest as I glanced uneasily up at him.

  But he just smiled his usual, warm smile as if he hadn’t been inches from kissing me two nights ago, as if he hadn’t broken my heart when he’d turned to Cora after singing to me, as if I was just a friend who meant nothing more than biology study sessions and the occasional conversation. Then he took Reese’s abandoned chair and sat next to me.

  “I haven’t seen you since Saturday to ask if you had any fun on the date,” he said, pulling out his notebook and flipping it open.

  My lips parted as I stared at him.

  When I didn’t answer him soon enough, he looked up. “Cora says we both got pretty drunk.” He leaned in closer and lowered his voice. “Are you like me? I can’t remember…anything.”

  My mouth worked, but when no words came, I closed it. He didn’t remember? Any of it?

  I wasn’t sure if I should feel relieved or crushed.

  I began to shake my head, slowly at first and then with a little more speed. “No,” I croaked. “No, I don’t remember anything, either.”

  He blew out a relieved-sounding breath. “Cora says I sang a song to her on the karaoke.” Rolling his eyes, he gave a rueful laugh. “That must’ve been awful.”

  No, it really hadn’t been. He’d had a good voice, a voice I could’ve listened to forever.

  Then a thought struck me. Had Cora not told him I’d sung that song with him?

  My bottom lip quivered, but I bit the inside of my cheek and refused to cry.

  The professor started class, but apparently Quinn was in a chatty mood. He began to write on his notepad before he bumped his leg into mine to get my attention.

  “I have a favor to ask.”

  I looked up at him, and he smiled at me big, his dimple melting my resistance. No way could I deny him anything. “What’s that?” I wrote back.

  “Would you be willing to skip classes tomorrow and go with me to help pick out a ring...for Cora?”

  I stared at his words. Then I reread them.

  A buzzing filled my ears and lead weighed down my stomach. But no matter how many times I read his words, they said exactly the same thing every time.

  I must’ve stared too long, because Quinn nudged my knee again.

  I veered my gaze up to his face. The question in his eyes
snapped me back to the present. I blinked, then blinked a little more before I mouthed the word, “Wow.”

  It wasn’t necessarily a good wow, but he smiled anyway as if pleased by my reaction. His eyes lit up, his mouth swooped into that sexy curve I loved, and his entire face just...glowed.

  He was happy, so freaking happy while I was afraid I might vomit. I closed my mouth and forced each breath through my nose. Then I nodded because I was totally unable to write the word yes.

  “So...this was unexpected,” I finally found the courage to admit the next day.

  I sat in the passenger seat of Quinn’s truck as he drove us to the jewelry store. So he could buy Cora an engagement ring.

  He glanced at me. “Hmm?”

  “Your, you know...” I flailed out a hand. “The ring. Your engagement. I didn’t... I mean, I didn’t realize you were that serious about her...that you guys were that serious.”

  His cheeks reddened as he grinned out the front windshield. “Well...yeah. It was pretty unexpected. I mean, I hadn’t been planning it or anything.”

  “But yesterday you just, what...woke up with a wild hair to propose marriage to someone?”

  Okay, I might’ve sounded a tad bit bitter there, because he glanced at me in surprise.

  “I mean…” I rushed to add, except he was already shaking his head.

  “Cora isn’t just someone. She’s my girlfriend. I’ve been dating her for months. We’re in love.” He cocked me a searching glance. “You don’t think I should ask her? You think it’s too soon?”

  Face flooding with heat, I waved my hand. “I wasn’t saying you shouldn’t ask.”

  He nodded. “Then you think I should?”

  Grr. Why was he making me answer this? I just wanted to lean forward and bang my head against the dashboard. I was the last person on earth who should answer that question.

  All the no reasons floated through my head first.

  Because I want you for myself.

  Because she lies.

  You’re too young. You haven’t dated her long enough. She doesn’t even like football. She lies. And I want you for myself.

  Ugh. I couldn’t tell him any of that.

  So I thought up the yes reasons.

  She’s sick and she needs support, the kind someone warmhearted like you could give. Any woman would be lucky and honored to receive a question like that from you.

  You love her.

  And with that reason in my head, I lost my taste for all the yes motives. I stared out the side window of his truck. He loved her, and there was no way to argue my way around that.

  “I think you should do what you feel in your heart is the right thing to do.”

  Quinn was quiet for a minute. “She woke up so happy on Sunday morning. I mean, she even said Saturday night was the best night of her life.”

  No, it had been the best night of my life. And then Cora had stolen it from me by hopping onto that stage and kissing him after he’d sung that song to me.

  “And I can’t remember what happened, but something did. Something big. I think it was something amazing.”

  I swallowed, sinking lower in my seat, wondering if it had been something amazing with me…or something amazing with Cora. I was tempted to tell him…about us, how we’d talked, flirted, almost kissed, how he’d gazed into my eyes when we’d sung that song together. But what if I was wrong? What if the amazing thing he thought he remembered had really been something afterward that had happened with Cora?

  What if I was trying to steal my roommate’s boyfriend while he wanted to buy her an engagement ring? That would make me the lowest of low, especially when she was so sick and…

  I drew in a shaky breath. Since moving here, Cora hadn’t been acting as I remembered her from home. But maybe the lies and the secrets would stop after the transplant. She had to be scared; I knew I would be. Maybe fear was just making her lash out. And maybe she’d been so distasteful to me lately because she didn’t like the way I always looked at her boyfriend. I certainly wouldn’t blame her for that. So what if she and Quinn really did belong together and I was hampering it by making him question his reasons?

  “She dropped a hint too.” Quinn glanced at me swiftly before returning his attention to the road. “A pretty big one. On Sunday morning, she pretty much told me how she wanted me to propose.”

  I nodded and swallowed. “Well, then. It sounds like you know what she’ll say when you ask.”

  He shifted in his seat, looking uncomfortable. “You still don’t think I should ask her, though, do you?”

  Sucking it up, I smiled at him. “Actually, I’m happy Cora found someone who’s so sure about her, and who treats her as well as you do.” I set my hand on his arm and ignored the thrill that touching him sent through me. “I think you’re going to make her an amazing husband.”

  He nodded humbly, his grateful smile killing a little part of me. “Thank you. That means a lot, Zoey.”

  “You really didn’t have to buy me lunch.”

  Across the outdoor table from me, Quinn looked up from his sandwich. “I wanted to. Plus, I’m starving.” He sank his teeth into the bread and moaned.

  “Nothing like finding the best ring ever to rouse your appetite?” I guessed.

  He grinned, rather proudly. “It was a pretty amazing ring, wasn’t it?”

  I nodded. “It was definitely my favorite.”

  With a laugh, he dunked a handful of fries into his ketchup. “I could tell. Once you saw that one, you didn’t really look at any of the others.”

  “What can I say? I have awesome taste.”

  “Yes, you do.” He paused to reach across the table and cover my hand with his. His fingers were large and warm. I wanted to flip my palm up and press the two together. But I refrained as he sent me a serious look. “You were amazing today, Zoey. Thanks for going in there with me. I don’t know how I could’ve done this without you. You’re the best.”

  I shrugged, even though the crack in my heart widened a couple more inches. “It was no big deal. I’m honored you thought to ask me.” Honored and yet heartbroken.

  Quinn grew somber. “No, seriously. You really are the best, you know. It’s...” He glanced away before turning back to smile at me, killing me with his dimple. “It’s not easy for me to make friends. Cora and the guys at Forbidden are really the closest I’ve ever gotten to anyone. But you...you’re one of the best friends I’ve ever had. I’m glad Cora talked you into coming here this semester. I think you really helped settle her down some. I’d been getting worried that she was partying too much and just...she was starting to get so wild. But you calmed her back down to more like how she was when I first met her.” He squeezed my fingers warmly and then let go. “Thank you.”

  Brushing my bangs out of my eyes, I changed the subject before I could start bawling all over him. “So how’re you going to propose?”

  “Well.” He sat back and took a breath. “Her favorite place to eat is Jenny’s Crab Shack, so I was going to go in before taking her there and see if the waiter can bring the ring in with the meal, hanging from a pincher or something like that. I’m not looking forward to doing it out in such a public place.” He sent me a sick kind of smile. “But that’s what she wants.”

  I nodded. “Yeah. I can see Cora getting a kick out of that kind of proposal.”

  Quinn nodded. “But I still don’t know what I’m going to say.”

  “What?” I set my hand over my chest. “The future heart surgeon doesn’t know how to phrase a wedding proposal?”

  When he flushed, I rolled my eyes. “Just keep it simple. Get on one knee, take her hand, and stare lovingly into her eyes. Then say something like, ‘With every beat of my heart, I belong to you. I love you, Cora Lorraine Wilder. Will you marry me?’”

  Quinn gazed at me. When he didn’t respond, I flushed and ducked my head. “Okay, so that was probably too corny, but I thought the heart reference would be cute, since, you know...”

  �
�No. No.” He shook his head. “It wasn’t corny at all. It was…it was perfect actually. Thanks, Zoey.”

  My heart beat hard in my chest as I realized in that moment, I didn’t just have a crush on Quinn Hamilton. I loved him.

  Oh, God. I loved him.

  “Hey,” he murmured softly, knocking on the table in front of me to get my attention.

  When I lifted my face, he pointed at a couple passing by us on the sidewalk. “You can tell he likes her.”

  They weren’t holding hands or even touching, and they were facing their attention down instead of ahead of them where they were going, but I totally agreed with Quinn’s assessment.

  Still, I had to ask. “How can you tell?”

  He smiled softly. “Watch. He picks a leaf off every tree they pass. It’s like he has to keep his hands busy to keep from reaching for her.” And on cue, the guy reached up and tugged at a new leaf from the tree he passed.

  I grinned at Quinn. He grinned back and returned his attention to the couple as if he was waiting for the guy to bypass the next leaf and reach for the girl instead.

  “Shawn and Jules kissed,” I blurted out.

  He turned back to me slowly. Then his eyes widened. “On Psych?”

  I nodded. “I saw it this weekend.”

  “How far along are you? I’m going to have to catch up.”

  I began to play with my food, realizing I hadn’t touched a bite. “Do you think they’ll end up together?”

  “I don’t know,” he answered. “I hope so. They better.”

  “Yeah. I hope so too.” Because if they didn’t, I’d probably lose my hope in love altogether.

  I had a home game on Thursday and was off work on Friday, so I planned to take Cora to Jenny’s Crab Shack then.

  We won our game, of course. We always won. With Noel at the helm, we were practically unstoppable. We’d actually won so hard I got to play quarterback for the last five minutes.

  Jazzed about that and nervous about my proposal to Cora, I couldn’t stop drumming my fingers on my thigh as I sat at the table and waited for our main course to arrive.